To be read in a southern acsent

While I was visiting Iraq and giving another speech; just trying to bring peace to Iraq a very disgruntled reporter threw his shoes at me! The president of the USA. Ha! He couldn’t hit me with his first shoe or his second. I have the reflexes of a cat! He just did it for the attention. All I said was that his shoes were a size ten. He shouted This is the end and a farewell kiss you dog. I only found out later that it was a supreme insult in Iraq to through shoes at a person. Heck this is America not Iraq so I don’t care.http://http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=president+George+W.+Bush+gets+shoes+thrown+at+him&docid=964595548736&mid=7BDF41829335162E59D67BDF41829335162E59D6&FORM=VIVR5
Use this link to view the video